An excerpt from How to Create a Magical Relationship: The Three Simple Ideas That Will Instantaneously Transform Your Love Life
by Ariel & Shya Kane
Oh, the pressure! Men and women are trying to find “The One.” When looking for a potential mate, the urge to get in there and make it work is a driving force. People are so busy looking for someone who is relationship material and finding Mr. or Ms. Right that they forget to have fun. In fact, dating to have fun is thought of as frivolous or secretly held as downright immoral. If you are going out to enjoy yourself and have fun, rather than finding a marriageable mate, it is generally viewed as a big taboo.
Not true of me! you might say. I think having fun is really fine and a great idea.
OK, fill in the blank: A woman who has four dates with different guys in one week is a _______.
Or, fill in the blank: A fellow who is dating four different women is a _______.
Of course, some of you might fill in the blank with the idea that he or she is ‘lucky,’ but is that really the truth? Have you ever found it difficult to date, even casually, more than one person at a time? Have you ever had only one date with someone and then spent a lot of time thinking about him or her to the exclusion of all others? Have you ever passed up going out because you are waiting, hoping for that fantasy phone call or email that never comes? Or, have you pined for someone who lives in another city or country, knowing full well that you have no intention of moving and neither does he or she?