By Ariel & Shya Kane
Start with the idea that how you do anything is how you do everything, and it will empower you to investigate how you relate–not just in a love relationship, but also with yourself and all others. This defuses the mindset of looking to fix what is “broken” and sets you on the path to having magical relationships in all areas of your life.
Your DNA is unique and in every cell of your body. The way you relate to life and to others is also unique to you. The way you operate is predictable, so it will repeat itself over and over again. Of course, there will be instances when you do not react as you usually do, but if you look at the overall pattern of your behavior, you will start to identify these predictable, recurring ways of relating. In other words, in certain situations with certain types of people, you usually respond the same way.
Using our anthropological/transformational approach, if you become aware of the way you function, behaviors that have heretofore interfered with or destroyed relationships can be identified. Then the Principles of Instantaneous Transformation again come into play. If you realize that you can have related only the way you did until you became aware of your behaviors (Second Principle) and if you do not judge what you see, these mechanical behaviors will complete themselves (Third Principle), creating the possibility for magical relationships. Of course, if you resist what you discover, this will reinforce your automatic, reflexive behaviors and keep them around (First Principle).